If I'm Not Speeding, Then I'm Not Maximizing Shareholder ValueIf Im Not Speeding, Then Im Not Maximizing Shareholder Value Warning: This Vehicle Operates on Capitalism and Caffeine You ever slam the gas pedal just to shave 32 seconds off your commute? Thats not reckless drivingthats a strategic acceleration in the name of pure, uncut shareholder value. If your foot is heavy and your loyalty is to the boardroom, this 8. 5" x 2. 5" weatherproof bumper sticker (or magnet, if you're noncommittal like your Series A

glitter inside if you rip it apart

organic Milky Oat tops

Well this shocking greeting card featuring a dick in its final explosive moment of pleasure should do the trick

realizing they should probably stop

but not overly constrictive

it can squawk

just for fun

If durability is your concern

It’s Never Lupus

This decal joins our legendary lineup of weatherproof vinyl chaos

ICONIC DESIGN & ULTIMATE FUN:

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